Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize