He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Randomize
