Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
