I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
