it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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