Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
