woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I just want nice things and good sex
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
