We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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