wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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