He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize