have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Randomize
