I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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