If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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