I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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