I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Duck Duck Cougar?
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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