She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
