Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Operation Purity has been aborted
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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