is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize