i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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