Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
