love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
