Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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