In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Randomize
