Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Randomize
