Just fell off a train. Bad.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize