3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
