Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
