his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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