Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize