Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
