he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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