How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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