Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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