At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
