i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
