Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
