Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
