Grow some girl-balls and come out already
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
