i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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