why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize