You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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