i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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