a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Randomize
