I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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