Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
