a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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