Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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