you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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