I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
ugly people sure do ruin things
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
