so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
